I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Randomize
