no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
