Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.

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  (201): Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else. http://tfl.nu/yjnf
  Replies (2) Good night (534) Bad night (1022)
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  (415): View more from California

  fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.

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  (415): fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background. http://tfl.nu/i9c0
  Replies (22) Good night (3287) Bad night (720)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours

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  (617): i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours http://tfl.nu/0tnj
  Replies (34) Good night (2519) Bad night (2534)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  he told me I talked like a deaf person

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  (908): he told me I talked like a deaf person http://tfl.nu/v63x
  Replies (9) Good night (819) Bad night (5550)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.

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  (865): Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that. http://tfl.nu/7i54
  Replies (18) Good night (11233) Bad night (959)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?

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  (479): Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one? http://tfl.nu/0w3a
  Replies (55) Good night (945) Bad night (6582)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"

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  (714): You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo" http://tfl.nu/an5c
  Replies (9) Good night (1318) Bad night (4060)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!

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  (406): Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you! http://tfl.nu/h6a1
  Replies (2) Good night (1087) Bad night (749)
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  (310): View more from California

  I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.

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  (310): I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient. http://tfl.nu/0squ
  Replies (1) Good night (1247) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!

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  (970): Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!! http://tfl.nu/2nfr
  Replies (1) Good night (959) Bad night (503)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Coming to you live from the floor of my office..

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  (919): Coming to you live from the floor of my office.. http://tfl.nu/0ate
  Replies (2) Good night (1306) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (351): View more from Massachusetts

  I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.

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  (351): I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh. http://tfl.nu/v1ee
  Replies (1) Good night (932) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale

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  (978): It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale http://tfl.nu/xdvd
  Replies (8) Good night (1828) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack

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  (502): Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack http://tfl.nu/0ld5
  Replies (3) Good night (752) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand

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  (443): Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand http://tfl.nu/0tkh
  Replies (4) Good night (288) Bad night (684)

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