Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  I heard we made out

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  (212): I heard we made out http://tfl.nu/5m1y
  Replies (8) Good night (4100) Bad night (808)
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  (949): View more from California

  "it" just moved

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  (949): "it" just moved http://tfl.nu/94mg
  Replies (10) Good night (671) Bad night (858)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now

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  (267): i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now http://tfl.nu/0gky
  Replies (28) Good night (2137) Bad night (1058)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.

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  (386): after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time. http://tfl.nu/767v
  Replies (59) Good night (35986) Bad night (1089)
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  (661): View more from California

  May God have mercy on my new vibrator.

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  (661): May God have mercy on my new vibrator. http://tfl.nu/qino
  Replies (98) Good night (8451) Bad night (981)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?

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  (252): Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome? http://tfl.nu/vqed
  Replies (56) Good night (1992) Bad night (9612)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?

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  (512): Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over? http://tfl.nu/e898
  Replies (11) Good night (3443) Bad night (2380)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.

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  (859): you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so. http://tfl.nu/9261
  Replies (5) Good night (2496) Bad night (802)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.

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  (703): I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia. http://tfl.nu/9rne
  Replies (8) Good night (1817) Bad night (1061)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again

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  (210): he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again http://tfl.nu/vgv1
  Replies (1) Good night (1141) Bad night (775)
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  (949): View more from California

  One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.

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  (949): One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers. http://tfl.nu/qlpq
  Replies (6) Good night (1807) Bad night (471)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.

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  (519): I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time. http://tfl.nu/5ti8
  Replies (7) Good night (850) Bad night (695)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus

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  (419): Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus http://tfl.nu/mjlu
  Replies (11) Good night (1544) Bad night (892)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry

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  (610): Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry http://tfl.nu/g7mi
  Replies (3) Good night (652) Bad night (289)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole

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  (206): I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole http://tfl.nu/tvcl
  Replies (2) Good night (628) Bad night (276)

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