bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.