I can't watch pbs sober anymore
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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