dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Your penis caused this!
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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