Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I didn't shave. On purpose
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
