after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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