I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
