Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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