Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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