I wish I could punch you in the face.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize