Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize