I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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