he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize