His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
