me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
