So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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