So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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