Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
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I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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