I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
