You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
