dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize