its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
