don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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