I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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