He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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