How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
