Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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