The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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