4 words: hood of his car
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
