This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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