For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
