You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
send nudes
from the living room?
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