is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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