you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Terrible idea I love it
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
