The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Randomize
