does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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