Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize