I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize