It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days