I'm really into asian looking animals
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party