I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
