I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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