And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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