if i died would you start the facebook group?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
