Dual....:-)
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
