I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
