So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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