just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
