my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
