Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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